Well, I finally heard it: The “d” word. Diabetes. My high-sugar blood ran cold when that word was carelessly uttered to me by the nurse from my gynecologist office.
For various reasons, I went to her office to discuss some health issues I have been enduring and part of her response was to require a bunch of blood work. One test in particular was a two hour glucose test. This is the one that ultimately resulted in the phone call.
Now, being overweight, and rather sedentary are both key factors in diabetes, in addition to a family history of diabetes. Yes, I have all three main risk factors. but still, somehow I thought I was going to “fly below the radar” for at least a few more years.
So, now that I have been officially diagnosed with diabetes, where will I go from here? Well, I got that call on Wednesday, and on Friday I was already sitting at the nearest Weight Watchers facility. I need to make some changes, and I need some support. After my terrible weigh in and paperwork and peptalk meeting, I left the facility and cried. I do not want to go through this. Not now. I am busy, I am active, I have many things to occupy my time. But then I heard a word that made me stop crying and take heed:
“This is not a physical battle. This is a spiritual one.”
This makes it look a little different. If you are like me and believe in forces of good and evil, and believe that God has a plan for every believer who loves him, then you know there are other forces who would love to interfere with that very good work he has planned. My enemy would love to see me fail, fall into to despair, be consumed with food, and desires for food. The enemy would love for me to get angry, get busy, get distracted. He would love for me to become consumed with selfishness and bitterness.
So, in full light of the fact that this is a spiritual battle – I am following the Weight Watchers food plan, exercising daily, and praying a lot. I am trying to figure out “Points” and balance and blood sugar. And I am asking for prayer. The battle with my weight has been life-long and has swung from caring very much and working really hard and achieving some weight loss success to complete apathy.
My specific prayer is that as I learn the right choices, I will become accustomed to healthier eating, daily exercising, and portion control. I want to be victorious in this physical battle, but at all times mindful of the spiritual one as well. I would also like for this whole process to be more natural so that food and eating cease being an idol. Right now, I am having to be so thoughtful and careful about my food that is nearing idolatry. While I may have to devote more thought to it, I do not want to become obsessed.
Could you join me in prayer that I am able to accomplish all these things? I need to do so for my health so that it does not distract from the ministry God has called me to: My husband, my children, my family, and my faithful friends and readers. I also do not want to spend so much energy and time devoted to this that I essentially lose my focus on the eternal. For now, I am going to try to learn to control my blood sugar with diet and exercise, and not with medication or insulin. I have a follow-up in six weeks to reevaluate the situation.
Thanks, friends. If you have any encouraging words or stories of success with losing and maintaining healthy weight, I would love to hear from you. If you can comment below, perhaps this will be an encouragement to others as well. In all things in my life, I pray that this will ultimately be for God’s glory.