Desperate by Sarah Mae and Sally Clarkson: Lack of Training, Chapter 6

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Blogging my way through Desperate has been very good for me.  I have had to stop and re-read and re-ponder every chapter. I have had to seek God’s face while reading the chapters to see what he would have me share. This chapter had so much in it I could relate to- and much of it was the reason I started Homemaking 911. Lots of people who “know” me through my blog think I must have the perfect house, the perfect garage, the perfect yard.  Perhaps they have not really read my blog, or heard my story.  I was completely lost when I left work to stay home full-time.  I had no idea how to run a household, feed the kids, and get a shower in the same day.  I had to figure it out, or die in a pile of dishes and laundry.  I was not equipped, not trained, and still struggle with knowing how on earth others have those perfect houses and lawns.

There are times I have it together better than other times, but it is still not natural to me. I am not equipped.

Apparently, I am not alone.

This chapter is all about the truth- some of us are not natural born organizers/cleaners/cooks. But all of us have to do it on some level to survive. And many of us are training our children right along with trying to train ourselves.

Sarah says, “And now that I have to train my own children, I yearn for the training I never have. Now I have to train myself and my children; it’s the blind leading the blind!”

Sally says: “..when I first interfaced with housekeeping, I have never done it, never been trained for it, and had no idea of the magnitude of it. In my mind, I was simply going to play house with my children like I did when I was a little girl.”

In addition to offering those little words: You are not alone this chapter also adds in the truth- there are things you can do to help train yourself to make this part of parenthood better. Here is part of their advice:

“God has taught me that I need to decide to accept the work as a normal part of life and not struggle against it….understand that it is never going to go away.”

Again, this goes back to the idea that if you think about things in a realistic, God-honoring way, they do just seem easier. This chapter has so much encouragement for the mommies out there struggling in this area.  I will re-read it, probably more frequently than I like to admit.  And hey, if you come by my house and it is messy, the yard is not perfect, and the kids are playing, goofing off, and being creative with some crumbs on the floor- you can’t say I did not warn you.  Being an authentic friend means that I will let you in my house, even on messy days, and I won’t spend ten minutes apologizing for the state of my house. If you came to interview me for House Beautiful, could you at least phone ahead?

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